Watching the news and reading the newspaper is informative. It gives people something to do. It gives people a connection to the outside world they may feel they don’t have without it. And though there are some amazing things to hear about and amazing things to witness on the screen that bring absolute joy to the ears listening intently, there’s also some things that you could go your whole life without hearing because they bring down your mood so quickly. Within a blink of an eye, you can become annoyed of what you heard and it’s as if having a good day after that seems impossible, questioning everything around you.
That’s why when my parents were lounged around the TV, discussing whatever was going on and arguing their opinions over a debate, I didn’t care to listen. I never really did. I’ve always been the person to live in the moment rather than question everything happening.
I’d like to think that that has been one of the best decisions I’ve made in my life so far.
As selfish as I’ve been over the past couple of weeks of claiming Eleanor in my possession, I let her have a day out with ‘the girls’, Pam and my mom. Connor, Dad, and I were watching ESPN, talking rather paying attention most of the time.
It was comforting, really, to have returned to the house I spent most of my life in. Even as adventurous as I am, always wanting to venture off and try new things and see everything I possibly can before tomorrow, staying at home and enjoying a cup of coffee really did make my skin feel familiar with the environment I was now settling in.
“You know, boys,” Dad said, straightening up in his recliner, “I might get tickets to the Super Bowl this year.”
Connor practically choked on his coffee and winced. The liquid probably burned his throat, and I chuckled at that, breaking the shocked look that swiped along my face.
Connor coughed a few times to clear his throat before saying, “You’re not serious, are you?”
“Why would I kid around about this?”
“Well,” I started, reclining back on the couch, “Watching Connor choke on his coffee is a pretty hilarious thing to see.”
“Ha-ha,” Connor said flatly, cocking his head in my direction.
“You boys know how long I’ve been trying to get a hold of those tickets,” Dad said, “I should have enough money for four tickets. And who knows, maybe the Bengals might be playing.”
Connor and I looked at each other and raised our eyebrows. We both knew too well we’d be taking the days off of works before and after for this.
“So mom would be coming with?” Connor questioned, knowing mom didn’t favor sports as much as we did.
“No, actually. I was thinking of letting Josh’s friend tag along.”
As soon as my mug met my lips, I squinted my eyes over the rim, “You mean Eleanor?”
“Yeah,” Dad nodded, “The night of the New Year’s Eve, we were talking about the Bengals game the previous day. I think she’d enjoy it.”
I stared into my cup, trying to remember when this piece of information made its way into my brain or if it ever did. And then, almost vaguely but not quite, I remember when we had watched the Giants vs. Cowboys game at Kilroy’s Sports Bar and how much she was paying attention to the screen that she had almost forgotten I was sitting right next to her.
That was when I glanced at her really quick without drawing her attention away from the screen. I could recall how I smirked at her, a bit overjoyed to know that she was into football as I was. It was one of the many things that had intrigued me about her, that kept me tagging along behind her.
I shook my head out of my thoughts, “When did I miss this?”
“I don’t know,” Dad answered, genuinely thinking while sipping on his coffee, “Maybe you were in the bathroom. But I already told her about the tickets.”
The wheels in my head immediately started turning, some with good purpose and some with bad results. It could be nice for her to spend more time with the family, have her be one of the guys for a while and that much closer to me than she has already gotten. But then again, I didn’t know if by then I’d be comfortable with the idea of my dad getting more aware of what we had between us.
In fact, I didn’t even know if Eleanor and I were going to be an item by then, since it felt as if yesterday was our first date.
Instead of contemplating more than I should, I grinned and shrugged my shoulders, “If she’s up for it, then why not?”
“I think it’d be good,” He continued, “She’s a nice girl.”
“Yeah Josh,” Connor commented, gripping and shaking my shoulder, “You should date her.”
I swatted him away and glared at him, “Please, we’re just friends.”
Dad shook his head and commented, “Josh, she is gorgeous. Have you thought about dating her?”
“You know,” I intercepted, drinking the rest of my coffee and setting the mug on the coffee table with a thud, “I very much enjoyed when we talked about sports instead of my love life.”
“No need to get all tense about it,” Connor said, waving his hand around.
I rolled my eyes, “It’s difficult not to when you guys gossip more than mom, combined.”
We continued talking about getting the Super Bowl tickets and the plans we’d make that weekend to book a hotel room. Eleanor was out, for now, and for once, that was a relief.
But not for long; the front door opened with three sets of footsteps pounding on the front carpet to stomp the snow off their shoes. Mom, Pam, and Eleanor greeted us with rosy cheeks and bags of Taco Bell. Connor immediately got up and greeted Pam with a kiss, taking the bags from her hands. Eleanor came over to the couch and presented me with not a bag of food but an Urban Outfitters shopping bag.
“What is it?” I asked, grinning and looking up at her.
“Look inside and see,” She replied, sitting next to me.
I dug through the bag and smiled instantly, feeling my heart flip over a couple of times before settling in its rightful place. It wasn’t only the thought of this gift that meant a lot, but the fact I loved fedoras. Especially this beige one she brought.
“You didn’t have to get me this,” I said, turning to her.
She shrugged her shoulders, “Your mom mentioned it and it made me think of you, so I had to.”
It took a lot of will to not let my lips seek out for hers and groan into her mouth and tangle my fingers into her hair, but I refrained the urge to do so. I smiled and hugged her with one arm, “Thanks so much. This is great!”
Dad cocked his head with smile, and I knew immediately what he was trying to initiate. I rolled my eyes slightly before getting up beside Eleanor, “Come on, let’s eat.”
We got our food and headed down to my room, already half done with our food in five minutes.
“The more your mom feeds me,” Eleanor said between a bite, “The more I need to eat.”
I shrugged my shoulders, “She is a pretty amazing cook. Who brought this, though?”
She raised her hand, as if waiting to get called on, while she wiped her mouth with a napkin, “I was planning on buying you the hat anyway, so I figured might as well be my treat.”
The grin on my face was unmistakable, “Since when did you get all sweet?”
“Excuse you?” She asked incredulously, “I have always been sweet. It’s you who’s been the asswipe and then turns all sweet the next second.”
“Only special people get to see the sweet side.”
“So I’m guessing that doesn’t include Connor?”
“He’s a little shit of a brother,” I shrugged, finishing up my chalupa, “Gotta love the kid, though.”
“No better ways to show your brother you love him than by being a dick to him,” She hummed, smiling and laughing.
I laughed after I sipped my Coke, “It’s the only way.”
She lied down on the bed, rubbing her belly as if that was going to help the fullness die down, “You really did miss them.”
Before I put our trash into the bag and disposed it, I looked at her intently. I could remember, almost as if it was yesterday, how calm and relaxed Eleanor was at home, how happy she was. I’d like to think I’ve made her happy in more ways than she and I would both like to admit, but I know nothing truly makes you happier than the comfort and security of having your family by your side.
“Yeah, I really did.”
After I got up, I settled next to her, wrapped my arms around her and let my nose inhale the scent that I could never put my finger on, the smell that was so intoxicating that it made you forget where you were or what day it was.
“Eleanor, can I tell you something?”
She shifted her head so she was now facing me, dangerously close to my lips that I wanted to kiss off my own sentence, but knew it wasn’t the right time for it, “What is it?”
My lips pressed against her nose, making her crinkle it and grin, “I want you to know that even though you technically said you did love me, that I might feel the same for you.”
Utter silence tried to seep its way through our cuddling position, and it did. But she was still staring at me intently and thoughtfully, not once straying away from my eyes. She touched my cheek and said nothing.
“You don’t have to respond. I just want you to know you’re not the only one with these feelings.”
She grinned softly, her whole face glowing with radiance while letting her thumb graze my cheekbone. Her silence as her response settled me, knowing I didn’t have to explain any further, nor did I need an explanation. As far as I knew from reading her body language, the body I’ve came to learn about and memorize pretty well, I knew she felt the same, and knew we would speak more about it when the time was right. And right now was just not that time.
“Okay, enough of the small talk. Now, we need to name my new fedora.”
Two days had passed since we named my new fedora Paul. And luckily, everyone was in their room right before going out to dinner. It made it an easier task to slip into Eleanor’s room, after I heard her attempting to sob quietly.
I approached her silently as to not startle her. She sat at the foot of the bed, crying into trembling hands. Her sobs were practically mute but they ripped through her throat like nine inch nails. It sounded as if a train wreck hit on full impact.
“Eleanor?” I asked softly.
When she didn’t reply and her sobs grew louder in pitch, I kneeled in front of her, trying to pry her hands away from her face. She swatted me away, breathing heavily. As if panicked.
And then it clicked in my head that I probably shouldn’t be here.
But I couldn’t leave her alone like this. So I crawled back awkwardly on the carpet, keeping a good six feet away from us. Eventually, even though it seemed like a lifetime of waiting, her hands stopped fidgeting and her sobs were no more, leaving her sniffling and breathing heavily. It took even more time for her to get her breathing evened, but when she did, her eyes flickered up to mine, shaking her head with more silent tears cascading down her face.
“I’m so sorry you had to see this,” She stated shakily, wiping her eyes with her fingertips.
“Don’t be sorry,” I replied softly, inching my way closer and setting my hands on the top of her knees.
She placed her hands on top of mine, feeling my flesh and making the hairs on it stand at attention. I gulped and hoped it wasn’t loud.
Right when I was questioning whether to ask what happened or not, she answered for me, “Your mom and I had a chat.”
“She said,” She shook her head and giggled, “She said that it’s best if we don’t get involved with each other.”
I chuckled uncomfortably and bit my lip, “What? Did she say anything else?”
“She said she knows we look happy together, but she knows something’s going on. She saw our New Year’s kiss, and thinks I’m too young for you.”
“How did she know your age?”
“She asked, and I decided it was best to just, well…tell her, rather than lie in her house.”
“When did you two talk?”
“Just now when I was going to use the bathroom. She stopped me, and yeah.”
I sighed, brought the back of her right palm to my forehead in frustration. I was fuming at the fact that my mom had the nerve to disrespect Eleanor, when I knew she couldn’t have said anything to make her upset. Eleanor wasn’t like that. Truthfully, she wouldn’t have the courage to. Not to someone she just met recently.
“Look,” I spoke after some seconds, looking at her and grasping both of her hands, “We’re going to get out of here after dinner. I’ll tell Andre I’ll pick him up at the airport and he’ll stay with us at my place. I’ll talk to my mom at dinner while you go to the bathroom, alright?”
“Josh, I don’t want you to leave just because of her telling-“
“No, we are,” I insisted sternly, “We don’t have to be around that.”
“But didn’t you expect that to happen?”
I let my head sink in surrender after a second of thought processing, “I expected it, honestly, but out of nerves. Not out of past experiences…not really.” I shook my head, “Never mind that, let’s just enjoy one last free meal later and then we’ll head out. Got it?”
She nodded, pressing her lips in a firm line and shutting me out, something I wasn’t used to.
“Hey,” I inquired softly, standing up and kissing her lips, “You’ll be fine, I promise. We’re fine, and that’s all that matters.”
She smiled and kissed me again, bringing me down with her on the bed so that we were now facing each other.
“That’s not fair,” I insisted, laughing as I towered over her. She thought she could escape by crawling backwards, but I kept lurking forward, shaking my head and pinning her down under me as I showered her neck with soft kisses. Her giggles were uncontained, and I could tell it tickled a lot, so I stopped, not wanting to let anyone passing by hear our banter.
But she didn’t pause with confusion. Instead, she got clever and played along. While keeping me distracted with those hazel eyes that were the same as my eye color but looked a thousand times sexier on her, she pushed my sweatpants and briefs down just enough to reveal my ass to the warm air in the room.
I looked down between us. Even though she was biting her lip and staring me down with confidence that suddenly burst through the door, she grasped onto my growing erection after she licked her palm. A groan came out of my mouth without warning, and I quickly started clenching my teeth to prevent anymore noises that were too loud and would alarm anyone.
“Eleanor,” I sighed, smiling down at her, “This feels so good, but not now.”
“The ride home will be long,” She insisted. And that’s when she started cupping her hand and running it up and down my length.
Now I was sure she saw my pleasure. It was evident and I couldn’t hide how she made me feel, and the vulnerability I showed her frightened me, but with a good sensation. I wanted to feel like this more often, at the hands of her doing. Literally.
“But,” I closed my eyes, adjusting myself that I was now gripping the headboard, and breathed out, “Fuck.”
She grinned devilishly and moaned, quickening her pace but keeping her grip soft. Her hands did wonders. You could barely tell she cried before with that lustful expression masking over her features.
“Shhh,” She hushed, “Wouldn’t want anyone to hear.”
She was pure evil. Pure evil, straight from raw ingredients and I devoured each of the homemade seasonings. She did that to me, made me yearn for things I could have but at my own expense. A rush flooded me thoroughly each time, and she had the privilege of controlling those waves.
Her teasing got out of hand; her hand caressing my length and touching the head softly, then resuming her grip in slow and heavy pumps. Occasionally touching my balls and going right back to her speed. She stopped at one point, readjusting herself, and I took that as my opportunity to assist her by thrusting in her hand, right as my pre-cum had seeped out.
As she reached up to kiss me, I moaned into her mouth, though it sounded like a growl, “This feels so good.”
“Yeah?” She sighed, nibbling on my earlobe and smiling against the flesh of it.
My eyes rolled in the back of my head, unable to reply. The pleasure was taking over, and I had no intention of keeping it under control.
Once my thrusting got quicker and her fondling got trickier, moving towards the base and back to the head, I felt the first bead of sweat run across my forehead. I didn’t know how much I could take any longer, and I didn’t know how I wouldn’t be able to scream her name as I would come all over her hand.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” I whispered, “Eleanor.”
She just smiled and continued to watch me suffer.
I pushed up her shirt a bit, revealing her stomach and keeping my fingers grazing her skin, making her flush and arch just the slightest. I bit my lip, keeping in a scream, and stilling completely in her grip. My liquid came out in spurts, mostly in her hand and some on her stomach.
My head rolled back and I sighed, cursed in whispers only she could comprehend. I thrust into her hand just three more times before completely pausing and letting the tingling sensation in my body calm the adrenaline in my veins. She moaned playfully and fondled me in my own come a few more times before I gripped her wrist.
“You want to ruin me, don’t you?” I asked.
She winked at me and waggled her eyebrows, “That’s the idea.”
Our foreheads touched as I lowered myself closer to her. I let my breathing catch up with me before I planned on getting up and cleaning ourselves up, but instead of waiting for me, she helped herself.
She licked all of her fingers and moaned quietly, rolling her eyes in the back of her head. To my surprise, I didn’t come again at one of the sexiest things I’d ever seen a woman do.
My head shook as I kissed her, tasting myself in the process but not caring a single bit.
“You look and taste just the same,” She murmured against my lips, “Fantastic.”
“When will it be my turn?”
“The faster we get out of here.”
“Well,” I said, getting up and heading to the bathroom in her room, “What are we waiting for?”
She giggled and licked the excess fluid on her stomach with the tip of her fingers, “Teaching others how to have patience when you barely have any yourself, you hypocrite.”
“That’s a sign we’ve been around each other for too long.”
“You love it,” She complained as she stuck out her tongue, approaching me.
After I cleaned myself off and then her with a damp wash cloth, I disposed of it in the hamper. I wrapped her in my arms, brought her to my chest, and kissed her neck, saying against her soft flesh, “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”